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Eddie poured Cheryl another glass of wine.

"So," she said, tucking a strand of blonde hair behind her ear, "is it too soon to ask how it's going?" She bit her lower lip just a little.

"From where I'm sitting, everything so far has been great."

"I'm glad. I have to admit, I usually don't go on a lot of dates."

"Me neither," he admitted. "Especially from a dating app."

"Then I feel compelled to ask, why me?"

"There was something you said in your bio," he said, "that really stuck out to me."

"Really? I think it's so bland!"

"Not at all. What did it say? 'Not looking for someone to make all my dreams come true'?"

"Are you planning on disappointing me?"

He laughed. "I sure hope not. No, I mean that a lot of people seem to have unusually high expectations of me."

"Why is that?"

He looked around and caught a few stares in his direction. "Do you not...recognize me?"

She looked over him quizzically. "Should I?"

He grinned. "Do me a favor. Open your Google app and scan me."

"What?" she said with a laugh.

"I'm serious. Search Google for my face."

She reluctantly reached for her phone and held it up to his face. "This doesn't feel weird to you?"

"It'll make sense in a moment."

A long moment passed. Cheryl's face morphed from embarrassment to surprise. Then, shock. "It's really you, isn't it?"

"It is."

"Is that why everyone keeps looking at us?" she whispered.

"I'm afraid so."

"I knew you looked familiar!"

"I get that a lot," he said with a chuckle.

She downed the glass of wine. "I think I'm gonna need another."

He obliged and poured the bottle.

"But is all that stuff really true?" she asked.

"Unfortunately. Now, you see why I don't date."

"But, can you really...I mean, make wishes come true?"

"Only halfway."

"What does that mean?"

"I'm only half genie. My father was freed from a lamp an archaeologist found in a desert forty years ago. He married my mother, an old-fashioned human from the Bronx. I can only grant wishes halfway."

"Show me."

"Wish for something."

"Right now?"

"Sure. I'm not embarrassed."

Cheryl was pensive for a moment. A few more people at the restaurant recognized Eddie and began to stare. Some had even heard a fragment of their conversation and very small audience had begun to form.

"Um," she said, "I wish for a...diamond ring."

He snapped his fingers. Instantly, a small stone fell into Cheryl's lap. She held it up to the light.

"It IS a diamond! But wait...where's the ring?"

"That's the halfway part. Wish again, this time just for a ring."

"Okay. I wish for a ring."

Suddenly, a plastic, purple toy ring about six inches wide fell into her lap. She held it up and laughed.

"I'm glad you have a sense of humor about it," he said with a smile. "My last few customers weren't so impressed."

"Oh my God! What happened?"

"Oh, the usual. Most of the time people wish for money, but it always appears in some denomination from a country that's under sanctions or else in crypto in a wallet no one knows the password for. Stuff like that."

"Wow. Does anyone get angry when they don't get what they want?"

"Oh yeah. The trick is, it's best to wish for something that's valuable no matter what. Like you asked for a diamond. You were specific in the kind of ring you wanted. If you had just asked for an engagement ring, you might have gotten a Ring of Power replica and I would've gotten a glass of wine thrown in my face!"

"No, I would never!"

After a few more minutes of awkward silence, Eddie got the waiter's attention and said: "Would you like to get out of here?"

"I'd love to."

"Care to wish for anything else before we leave?"

She hesitated. "I wish someone else would pay for our dinner."

He snapped his fingers. Cheryl stepped away from the table and the two left the restaurant hand-in-hand.

The door closed behind him and the waiter approached the table to clean up. He opened his billfold to examine the table's check. Then, a wad of Russian money instantly appeared beside the check.

"Not again," he said, emptying his pockets. "Of course. Every time with that guy!"

In a huff, he dropped the dishes on the table and called for the manager.

The manager walked over from behind the bar. "What's wrong?"

"It's Eddie. He used *my* tips to pay for his dinner again!"

---

Submitted by altonbockauthor on Wed, Jun 15, 2022 to /r/WritingPrompts/

The prompt

One of your parents was human, the other was a genie. As a half genie, you can grant people's wishes half way. This leads people to wish for twice what they actually want, but that never ends up well.